And So They Lived, Happily Ever After...

The bards and the rhapsodists created a charming fairy tale,
It infused in me a hunger to which all else tasted stale.
I needed my soul filled with a love that would last forever,
A love that no ancient foe such as time or death could sever.

I thought i had been enamoured when i wanted one who needed me
But mutual need became a strangle hold and i needed to be free
I thought it was love once more, thought it was real when it burned hot,
But found out fast that flames burned out and were all too soon forgot.

I thought then that the poets lied, and love was merely their illusion
I pitied those who thought it truth as suffering from delusion
I wrapped up my dreams and fantasies, forgot my happily ever after,
And tried to hide the pain i felt behind frivolty and laughter.

I wondered what was missing, I wondered what could make me feel,
I questioned the point of wishing when nothing could make it real,
I thought i'd have to settle for second best, and live the lie,
And pretend that what i felt was all i could, and wait to die.

And then you went and kissed me and with a kiss, you stole my heart,
And you left behind a burning desire to never be torn apart
My body, my mind, my heart and soul, you give them all release,
Unique in all i've felt before, i finally feel at peace.

And all that i had dreamed of was but a shadow of what could be,
And i know that you're not perfect, but you're a perfect match for me
And so, my life's a fairy tale and my heart belongs to you,
I've fallen in love so many times, but it has only been with you.

Thank You

It seems i was wrong.
And i don't admit that lightly.
It happened again,
And i didn't think it likely.

So, thanks to the one who travelled to the dark,
Who dug up my heart and on it placed his mark.
For the one that gave it life and kept it safe and watched it grow.
For the one who taught me things i was too afraid to know.
For the one who saw beyond the mask, to the shadow left behind
The one that gave that shadow breath and taught it how to find
The light that hides deeper still just waiting for the day
That someone will takes its hand and say 'come out and play'

Hurt

I've seen
All the things you tried to hide
I've seen
All the things that made me cry
I've seen
The proof before my eyes
I've seen so many things
But trusting you has made me blind

The lies spoken as truth
Can swiftly break the spell
The whole world tumbles down
You'll never know how far i fell

I've felt
The pain that you gave to me
I've felt
The love that has set me free
I've felt
The loss of what could have been
I've felt so many things
But I feel so alone when you lie to me

Cold fingers through my spine,
Icy hands burrow in,
Tear out this heart of ice
Without breaking the skin.

I've heard
Tales that tend to make me blue
I've heard
Lies by ones that i'm close to
I've heard
Deceit by those who should stay true
I've heard so many things
But I've never heard the truth from you.

Heartless shell of a girl,
Held together with string
Going round in circles
A bird with a broken wing.

On Reflection

I gaze at my reflection,
And she stares back at me,
Yet does she have the same abyss
Where her mind should be?

Does she see her eyes gone blank
Does she know her smiles a lie?
Or is she as lost i am now
Just sitting wondering why

Shes looking through that looking glass
At the girl she used to know
Not knowing how it got this way
Nor knowing where to go.

The face that waits behind the glass
Hides the truer face within,
The only one that can tell the truth
Is the one beneath the skin.

But truth is to be protected,
And we have secrets left to keep,
So I hide myself behind my mask
And watch my relection weep.

The Fools Poem

"In that last dance of chances
I shall partner you no more.
I shall watch another turn you
As you move across the floor.

In that last dance of chances
When I bid your life goodbye
I hope she treats you kindly.
I will hope you learn to fly.

In that dance of chances
When I know you'll not be mine
I will let you go with longing
And the hope that you'll be fine.

In that last dance of chances
We shall know each other's minds,
We shall part with our regrets
When the tie no longer binds."

Excerpt from Fool's Fate by Robin Hobb

Pariah

Sight is as fickle as the last dream before waking,
That which should be discernible may never be clear.
The visionless masses know not what they're lacking
And they cannot miss what they've never held dear.

A sculptor am I who still carves my own image,
The better for all the poor blind men to see.
So they may feel amity with the one stood before them,
With the junque at their side, a sense of camarderie.

Yet i remain the pariah, and know they cant see it.
With eyes tightly closed, they'll remain in the shade.
If doubt should plague them they'll gather together.
And congratulate one another on a game so well played.

And I'll listen to words that have ceased to have meaning.
I'll anticipate anecdotes that were told thrice before.
These blind are skilled mimics of something still living,
Their guises become so familiar, they wear masks no more.

And i wonder if i could stop hiding the truth from them,
And create a fresh history and yet believe my own lies.
And could i still become as complacent a mockery?
Can i accept that its time to just put out my eyes?

Eye Soleil Shone.

So the walls come down here.
The walls fall down.
Naked and quivering.
All fall down.

Singular being.
Psyche is screaming.
Reality twisting its knife in your gut.

Alone and aware of it.
No room for false memory.
Dreams and fantasy, fading to dust.

Alone then.
While lost in the crowd.
With their noiseless screaming.
As then turns to now.
Continue alone.
While pretenders surround.
Dead things still dreaming.
And I cant recall how.

So the tears fall at last.

The tears are here.

Long lost clarity.

All goes clear.

Flights Of Fancy

Fly away.
Fly far.
Fly fast.
Dont look back, dont cry.

Fly away, little bird, fly far away, this cage has grown too small.
The feathers that gleamed so brightly have faded as they fell.
Bright eyes that shone so bright have grown so dim and still.
Or stay and become trapped once more, a living, loathing doll
In the cage where life was tarnished, leaving the prison grey and dull.

Stay here.
Stay near.
Stay safe.
Lay down now and die.